Each one of us want to see ourself in a positive light, but when that view is unintentionally negative or counterproductive to who we are trying to be, we may need to reflect on and make intentional efforts to change it.

This is especially true when who we are trying to become and the feedback we are receiving from others do not match. One can easily fall into the trap of thinking that the feedback is the confirmation of who they are, but it could be due to any other reasons. Therefore, we must be aware of this negative loop that can lead us to self-sabotage. 

Some of us may think that others are seeing us one way or has already figured us out, when the reality is most people are busy finding or figuring themselves out, are getting to know themselves or are completely oblivious about how they are seen, let alone worry about others. Thus, focusing on working on ourselves to build a positive sense of self is what matters the most. 

The idea is to draw the security of who we are from the inside, rather than outside ourselves.

 Almost everyone wears a mask in one way or another because we tend to act differently in various environment, like a teacher will be assertive than if the same teacher is spending time with their children or friends. Wearing this type of mask is expected and do not hinder who we truly are, but other type of masks can hide who we are, and they are the ones to avoid. Those are the one that some of us maybe so busy and preoccupied on fitting well, to hide who they truly are that they may not find the time to see others. 

Thus, we should try to not waste our time worrying how other see us, rather, we need to redirect our focus on seeing ourselves clearly, for the person we truly are. If we have worked from the inside, our own perception should not change based on outside circumstances. The reality is we are all most likely still discovering ourselves like everyone else because it is a lifelong journey. Therefore focus on you.  

Therefore, turning our focus on showing up as the best way we can, that right for us will help us see ourselves in positive light.

Let’s not let one mistake defines or overshows how we see ourselves, our image or self-esteem. Everyone make mistake and that how we learn, but what make a difference is to choose to learn from the mistakes and understand that it allows us to grow. By reframing our mind allows us to let go and not hold on to the fear and pain of that mistake, and risk of seeing ourselves as worse. We should make intentional efforts to learn from it, make changes and choose to positively move forward.

For instance, every time someone hurts your feeling, do you go on to plot and plan on getting back at that person, or choose to reflect on what we may be doing to attract that type of behavior from others or learn to set healthy boundaries. Consequently, this shift can help us see ourselves in a positive light because we are taking charge, instead of letting someone else dictate our feelings, emotions and behaviors. 

Let’s not let bad habits become the main reason for how we see ourselves. Habits are learned behaviors and so they can be changed if one chooses to do so. For example, someone who views themselves as lazy may start to embrace that laziness, and letting it become who they are, thus enhancing that perception. But seeing that they have the power to change the habit through intentional effort, they can avoid perpetuating a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Learn to adopt and hold positive beliefs and thoughts because they set the tone on how we see ourselves and the world. The image we project out is what we receive back and what we believe, we manifest in our reality, either consciously or not. This can become a self-sabotaging way unless we become mindful of the patterns of our self-perception and set intentional efforts to change it. The reality is that it is challenging to see yourself clearly when you hold a negative view of yourself and project that into the world, as it becomes your reality. For example, if we hold an unfavorable view of yourself, we may often see judgment on the faces of others, even if they are not judging them. Thus, projecting our own beliefs to the world around us.

If we learn to own our beliefs about ourselves, no one can take it away from you, unless you choose to. Like the quote from Henry Ford “whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you are right.” The Belief is yours and only you hold it. Therefore, we can work to hold a positive belief, rather than a negative one. Believe it and the world will follow suit. 

Have our own beliefs and values that we can fall back on when we cannot see ourselves clearly. Because when we have values and beliefs we try to leave by, we avoid being easily sway by things outside of ourselves that may not represent who we are or value in our lives.

we can create and manifest what we want to see in our lives and the meaning we choose to assign to it. For instance, you have seen a person with an average look, but so confident in themselves, and no matter how other see them, they are showing up as they feel about themselves because they hold a positive image in their mind and build a strong inner self. It is about our own beliefs and how we choose to see for ourselves, like the saying beauty is in eyes of the beholder. So, what you see is yours, own it, believe it and you can make it anything you see fit for you.

Switching old lenses that we have been wearing for so long can be challenging, because we must break patterns and habits that do not align with who we are becoming. But it can be done through intentional efforts, willingness to build a positive sense of who we truly are or want to be and moving from self-sabotage and self-fulfilling prophecy that hinder our self-perception to self-acceptance and self-discovery. This shift can go a long way in helping us start seeing ourselves with more clarity and positivity.